PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT TO MY TAS READERS:
My New Year 2o22 Resolutions for my readers at The American Spectator is to:
- Reduce all my 2,000-3,000-word articles to the same trim-and-svelte 800-1,200-word lengths that normal columnists write, and
- Publish twice-weekly on predictable days, i.e. the same two days each week, the way Krauthammer always appeared on Fridays, and Thiessen always appears on Tuesdays and Thursdays (except all the times he doesn’t). (Any preferences for which two days? Lemme know.)
- BONUS: And now you can follow me on Twitter at @DovFischerRabbi
Inasmuch as the two articles that follow today and next time are among the last things I am writing in pre-Resolution 2021, these run the usual two-part 5,000 (five thousand) words that my annual Year-End reviews always run. First, it was that kind of year to review. Second, it is my homage to the Filibuster that The Woke seek to terminate. And, besides, who makes a New Year’s Resolution without breaking it at least once? So here goes. Come re-live the year with me. Part One of Two below:
Year 2021 began as all years under Pelosi begin: with a Trump Christmas Season Impeachment. The year before it had been Ukraine. This year it would be something else. Who even remembers the charges? January 6 had not yet arrived. With each new Christmas Impeachment, Pelosi gained three or four new Republican adherents. The first time she got Mitt Romney to join her Smurf Blue half of the country. Now she was winning over Liz Cheney, Adam Kinzinger, and another two or so GOP kamikazes intent on going down suicidally as long as they could take Trump politically with them. At the rate of gaining four Republicans each year, Pelosi will need only thirty more years of annual Christmas Impeachments to bring the burgeoning GOP Congress over to her side. Unfortunately, the Annual Christmas Impeachment apparently was delayed in 2021 by supply-chain problems in delivering the annual “Nancy Pelosi Impeachment Pens” for distribution.
The November 2020 election defined the new year’s first days. While some prefer to focus on Venezuela machines, middle-of-the-night vote dumps, Fox News calling Arizona early, and long voting lines at Chicago cemeteries, others cite these instead:
- Let’s say the machines and tallies were accurate.
- The election was stolen nonetheless.
- Twitter and Facebook had shut down half the discussion while assuring that the other got propagated. Given the tightness of the determining electoral-college states, that alone stole the election.
- Social media shut down the New York Post exposé of the Hunter Biden laptop.
- Voter harvesting never should have been allowed to deliver ballots.
- More than three quarters of European countries do not allow absentee voting, while the November 2020 election treated absentee balloting in America as a religious sacrament.
- The few democracies that allow absentee balloting permit it only for the disabled and such, and even then someone needs to show up in person to get the ballot.
- Forty-five of 46 European countries require photo ID to vote. But many blue states refuse to mandate it on grounds that Black people supposedly are uniquely unable to produce photo ID for voting, only for check-cashing, concert-ticket-buying, proving age at liquor stores and bars, sports events, driving cars, getting through TSA security at airports, and such. Oh, yeah — and also for employment, like to get hired for a job and prove eligibility. (And the Left says conservatives are “racist” in their perceptions of Black intelligence!)
- There is something profoundly dishonest about an “Election Day” that lasts for a month. An election measures a precise 24-hour moment, a snapshot in time. Almost any election on earth will shift by a few points if conducted two weeks later or earlier. Candidates need to throw their best ads at the voters right before voting. It is dishonest to run an election for three and four and six weeks.
- When one observes that the exact same people who want 30-day-long voting are the same ones who want voter harvesting, no voter ID, who are willing to dispense with careful comparing of signatures on envelopes with election rolls, want to count ballots that arrive after deadlines, don’t mind missing postmarks, cancel one of three debates, and suppress social media discussion, one sees that this is not democracy, and it does not matter whether the tally machines were built in Venezuela, China, or Hell (Michigan).
Even as the year began and the annual Trump Impeachment passed the House, followed by the annual Senate rejection, January 6 arrived. This live video shows the moment the Capitol was invaded. Where was the massive police and security presence that should have been on hand? Where was the National Guard? The sergeant-at-arms has more than 800 employees who run security for the Capitol, while Capitol Police have 2,300 employees and officers. Beyond that, Metro police can be called. The rally was massive. If these people had come for insurrection, enormous blood would have been spilled. Instead, as evidenced by the video, relatively few removed the barricades, and the rest just followed the flow without any plan. Play Trump’s full actual speech. Listen especially to the embedded link for one minute between 18:00 and 19:00 — and particularly to the words at 18:47-18:56. Oh, wait. You can’t hear it. YouTube has removed it pursuant to its “community guidelines.” Uh-huh. So try this link. Read the transcript: “We have come to demand that Congress do the right thing and only count the electors who have been lawfully slated, lawfully slated. I know that everyone here will soon be marching over to the Capitol building to peacefully and patriotically make your voices heard.” (Emphasis added.) Trump’s only crime was splitting an infinitive. Tsk-tsk.
And yet January 6 had all the markings and makings of an Insurrection:
- Like the Civil War, a formal military command was set up to overthrow the government, reminiscent of the Army of Northern Virginia and its generals Robert E. Lee, Thomas J. Jackson, Nathan Bedford Forrest, James Longstreet, Albert Sidney Johnston, P.G.T. Beauregard, John Bell Hood, and others. Here, similarly famous uprising leaders stood at the fore.
- Like the Civil War, it began with several destructive bursts of cannon fire reminiscent of Pierre Gustave Toutant Beauregard’s attack on Fort Sumter.
- Like the Russian Revolution, people came dressed like moose and elks, a sure sign that a massive insurrection had been planned.
- Like the American Revolution’s crossing of the Delaware, the leader of the insurrection — in this case, Donald Trump rather than George Washington — gathered his troops in broad daylight and called on them explicitly to behave and follow the law.
- Like all famous insurrections and coups, when the mass of humanity entered the Capitol the insurrectionists pulled out their firearms and shot to death several dozen Congressional representatives. They set fire to the capitol building as the British had burned down the White House in the War of 1812. Members of The Squad were found, uh, dismembered. Others were defenestrated. The search continues for Nancy Pelosi.
- That was the first week of 2021. Only 51 left.
January was a time when Andrew Cuomo was perhaps the most respected governor in American media, when his Cuomo Brother was CNN’s biggest star, and when Joe Biden gave us all peace of mind, unlike Trump’s incompetent “Operation Warp Speed” that resulted in Pfizer, Moderna, and Johnson & Johnson creating vaccines faster than ever before. Biden’s first important promise was to end the pandemic in no time. History will record he honored his pledge. At no time did he end the pandemic.
Biden did, however, jump in with executive orders. In one fell swoop, in minutes, he converted America from a wildly profitable net exporter of energy to a beggar client dependent once again on tyrannical Arab Muslim sheikhdoms for dirty unregulated fuel production. Putin and Iran gained new oil and gas clients. Gasoline pumps shot up to $4 a gallon and $5 in California. Throughout the economy, inflation soared. Ocasio blamed Manchin. Biden chimed in that his new economic plan would stem the new inflationary pressures by authorizing the printing of trillions more money.
Biden launched his frontal assault on COVID by demonstratively “going to the mattresses.” That search led him to select Kamala Harris. Willie Brown’s protégée showed up in Washington, presumably to serve as Vice President or President of Vice. Kamala’s sneak preview came when she and husband Doug filmed an 83-second “Chanukah Greeting” YouTube video for ignorant Jews and others who would not know Chanukah from a dill pickle resting on a toasted bagel with a shmear. The video was panned widely, so Mamaleh Kamala next hired a Canadian company called “Sinking Ships Enterprises” — really — to employ five children actors to play … five children … in a loopy video where she tried womansplaining the space program to them, filmed during the final Taliban assault on Kabul. As excitement grew throughout the hemisphere that Kamala had arrived, record numbers of Mexicans, Guatemalans, Salvadorans, Hondurans, and Latinxxxxes surged to our southern border to greet her, hoping to catch even a glimpse of history to say they had seen the Veep whose name someday will be remembered alongside other towering subordinate preeminences like Spiro Agnew, Elbridge Gerry, Richard Mentor Johnson, Thomas R.Marshall, and Aaron Burr. Our southern neighbors literally scaled our border walls, just for a peek at Kamala the First who was assigned to the border. Disappointing them, she never visited the border. Meanwhile, on the subject of bagel shmears, compounding all their other failures, Biden-Harris are the first administration to preside over a nationwide cream cheese shortage at bagel shops.
The new Congress saw Democrats promptly suppressing newly elected Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene while preserving special committee assignments for documented Jew-haters and related nut jobs like Rashida Tlaib. Ilhan Omar, whose political husbandry came into question again as she was hammered about her marriage to two prior guys, one of whom — oh, brother! — seemed particularly relative, and then her extramarital affair with her campaign’s married media guy (he, not to his sister), ended up divorced from whomever and married to the media guy, Tim Mynett, who also raked in seven figures from Omar’s campaigns. In all, his Omar work brought his company, E Street Group, some $3 million including government COVID bailout funds, riches relatively unattainable in Ilhan’s Somalia. Despite uttering an occasional TV profanity, Ilhan continued to inspire throughout 2021, covering her hair for religious purposes to project and protect her sexual modesty and religious piety.
It was another Godwin’s Law year of everyone calling everyone else a “Nazi” and a “Hitler,” reflecting social media’s impact on a coarsening American culture that also utterly has abandoned the subject of fact-based history as a worthy academic discipline amid Critical Race Theory’s bogus New York Times 1619 Project. Even as every Hollywood director, producer, and screenwriter must include at least one Holocaust movie on a résumé, most American movie-goers still have no idea what a real Hitler is, a real Holocaust, a real Nazi. No, a Holocaust is not when the government forces a vaccine or a mask, even in situations that are insanely indefensible as public policy and deeply offensive to civil liberties (for example, forcing a person with severe lung disease to wear a mask in a hygienic medical setting where the only thing the mask accomplishes is to cut off his or her limited air supply … and so many more such inane examples).
Among the six million Jews and the millions of others tattooed with numbers on their wrists, corralled into ghettoes, rounded up into cattle cars, gassed, cremated, with gold extracted after death from their dental fillings and their corpses’ fat used for soap and skin for lamp shades in the 1940s, and otherwise forced into slave labor at I.G. Farben, most of them would have exchanged those Nazis, that Yellow Star, and that Holocaust for forcible masking and vaccinating instead. But this is 2021, an era when an Ocasio can compare America’s southern border to Auschwitz and can predict that the world has only ten years left because the climate now has passed the point of no return. As a result, environmental activists from Ocasio to Grinning Green Greta increasingly were vowing in 2021 never to bear children because such kids will not live to age ten before the sun destroys the earth, melting plastic straws in milk shakes. So the Green movement does have at least two precious benefits: no forthcoming Ocasio or Greta kids, and more milk shakes for the rest of us.
Major League Baseball virtue-signaled in mid-2021 by moving its All-Star game from Atlanta to Denver, where voting laws parallel those of Georgia and where Stacey Abrams also never was elected governor. Coca-Cola and other woke corporations initially joined the parade. In time, the boycott fizzled, and G-d demonstrated a bit of wry humor. How? By arranging for the Atlanta Braves to win the World Series, forcing MLB’s woke management not only to beg spritely to return baseball to Atlanta but even to champion politically incorrect Indian scalping tomahawks in support of the Braves, who stuck with their Indian sobriquet. No World Series game had a score of seven-up. The Woke, who actually know almost nothing of baseball — a sport that, like hockey, mostly has resisted Kaepernick-and-LeBron influences — were disappointed that the team opposing the Braves, the Houston Astros, offered no better: the state with the most abortion-restricted laws on the books. So there still is room to love baseball. And click this 2021 NHL link — from New York yet — to see in 104 seconds why America is not yet down for the count.